Motherhood Incorporated

Being attentive toward your child’s schoolwork emphasizes that school is important to you, which means it will be important to your child. When they want to share something that happened at school that day or talk about a test or project, be sure you make time to listen.

It’s tempting to do the bulk of the work when your child has a special project or assignment, but this really defeats the entire purpose of schoolwork in the first place. Make sure you’re helping, not taking over.

Be patient with children when they struggle with certain subjects or classes. Things don’t always come easily even to the brightest of students. Make sure they their hard work is the most important thing, not just their results.

The phrase “working parent” is probably one of the world’s worst oxymorons – is there any parent that is not a working parent?

Children are a full-time job from the time they are born until … well, there’s probably no point in a parent’s life when he or she is not concerned for their child’s welfare and circumstances, even when that child is no longer a child.

But of course, it’s true that the younger the child, the more time and emotional energy that is spent on their care; there’s no getting around this. There are, however, some ways that a parent can improve their organizational skills and abilities to help themselves.

The least used things get stored the farthest away.  If you use your sewing machine once a year, why is it in the middle of the family room and not a corner of the basement?  If you wear that nice black cocktail dress once every three years, why is it in your bedroom closet and not stored away in the guest room? Apply this principle to anything and everything.  Keeping all the hair items you use everyday in the bathroom is a good thing.  However, if you use your hot rollers once a month, put them someplace else where they’re not in the way.  It’s a lot easier to pull out these items the few times you use them than it is to trip over them every day. Steal space from anywhere and everywhere.  Small, flat plastic bins can be used to store out of season clothes under the bed.  The bottom shelf of the linen closet can be used to store papers or office supplies.  The laundry room can hold cleaning supplies and tools, or extra toiletry items. Yes, we did say that you should put things close to where they’re going to be used, but we’re talking about long-term storage here.  Your desk is not a good place to store a year’s supply of sticky notes and pens, so putting the extras in the linen closet and just replenishing when necessary will be easier on you than trying to work on a jam-packed desk. Also, if you can purchase heavy-duty plastic bins, you can store things in them virtually anywhere.  Holiday decorations can be put in the garage, out of season clothes in the basement, and so on. And remember to look up – use space on the walls as storage.  Install shelves on a wall of your kids’ rooms for toys and books; do the same in the garage for sports equipment or tools.  Metal shelving units can be purchased for the basement and garage as well; they’re typically inexpensive and quite sturdy. Stop getting new things!  As we said previously, this is probably the best advice for keeping yourself organized.  The less things you have, the less you need to keep up and maintain.  Really, how many pairs of shoes or kitchen gadgets does one person need? As with children, you might instill the rule that for every two things that come in, one thing must go out.  Every second new skirt you buy, one skirt or pair of pants must go.  For every two new pairs of shoes, one old pair must go. Of course this can’t always be a hard and fast rule.  If you’re buying new sneakers because your old ones are worn out, then of course you shouldn’t feel a need to purge. But give this some serious thought.  Must you really purchase every DVD or CD or new type of software?  Every knickknack, every new handbag that catches your eye? By being selective with not only the things you have, but the things you want to add to your home, you can be better equipped to keep your entire home neat and organized.

It’s probably best to have one main calendar the entire family can see. When you get a notice about a field trip or assignment due, make a note on the calendar. Use the same calendar for notes about bills to be paid, doctor’s appointments, and so on. No need to have five different calendars for five different purposes or one for every member of the house.

The same can be said about photos, artwork, and the like. Every time your child brings home a new piece of art, take down the one that’s already on the refrigerator – don’t simply add sheet on top of sheet. Choose a few selective photos to display on your fridge, and feel free to rotate them every month for something new to look at, but don’t try to put up every cute picture of your family, every note from your spouse, and so on.

Storing papers. Here too is where it pays to keep like with like, and to have one place for everything. For example, you should have one spot where you keep bills to be paid. This can be one corner of your desk or one small wicker basket. Don’t drop a bill by the front door or the kitchen table or anywhere else. Some even keep their checkbook and a roll of stamps in this same spot as well – when it’s time to pay bills, you’re all set!

For the kids’ school papers, have one plastic bin or file folder for each child. Once you’ve noted the necessary information on the family’s calendar, put the flyer or memo in this file. Then, when you’re looking at the calendar and see a field trip or bake sale or anything else coming up, you know where you can find that paper with the additional information you need.

It’s also imperative to have one spot in the home where you keep important papers, such as the deed to the house, title to the car, insurance policies, and so on. A fireproof metal box is handy, and can be purchased inexpensively at virtually any office supply store. You can of course get a safety deposit box at your bank if you wish, but these home safes can work just as well.

Small filing boxes can be purchased at any office supply store and typically work well for most household. You can put away the bill stub once it’s been paid, store your paycheck stubs, tax returns, and anything else out of sight. However, these storage methods won’t work if you don’t use them! Don’t just toss your papers anywhere and leave them there; make it a point to put things away in their file once you’re done with them.

Purge the paperwork as well! It’s a general rule that tax returns need to be kept for ten years, but other bills – utilities, car payment, etc. – can usually be pitched after six months, if even that. When you get a new bill in, make sure they’ve credited your account for your last payment, and then when the bill is paid and you file it away, pull out the oldest one in your file and pitch that.

It’s a good idea to have a small shredder for use at home, for security and privacy. If you don’t have a good place in your home office where it can be plugged in unobtrusively, put it away in a closet and when you need to purge papers and bills, stack them on top of the shredder. Then, once a month or every other month, pull it out, plug it in, shred your papers, and empty it.

A place for everything. It’s easy to think of that old adage, “A place for everything, and everything in its place,” but where to begin applying that? What if you don’t know something’s place – then what?

The first step in getting everything in its proper place is to identify where you’re going to use it. For example, don’t keep your bills in the kitchen if you have a home office. Chances are, you pay your bills at your desk, so keep the mail there. Keep clean towels in a cupboard or closet near the bathroom, not in the laundry room.

And putting everything in its place is of course the second step. Resist the urge to just drop things where you are – mail, hairbrushes, books, etc. – but instead, put them back where they belong when you’re done using them. At the very least, make it a point to put things away as part of your bedtime routine. This place for everything shouldn’t vary too much either. You should train yourself to always put your keys and purse on the shelf by the front door, the TV remote on the coffee table, the flashlight on the top shelf of the linen closet, and so on.

It’s also good to train your children to get into this routine as well. Jackets do not belong on the back of chairs, shoes do not belong in the middle of the living room floor, and so on. Of course, for them to put their things where they belong, you need to have an assigned spot for them in the first place, so be sure they have a place to put their jackets, shoes, backpacks, schoolbooks, and so on, and that these places are easily accessible to them – chances are, your five-year-old can’t reach the hangars in the closet!

Like with like. It’s helpful also to put similar items in one spot. For example, consider having one large basket with all your hair care items that you use after the shower – brushes, combs, mousse, styling gel, hairspray, and so on. Have another basket that holds everything you need to take your makeup off at night – astringent, toner, moisturizer, cotton balls, and so on.

By keeping all these things in one place or container, it makes it easier not only to keep organized, but to find them when you need them. Time to take off your makeup? Simply grab that basket.

Use this technique in the kitchen as well. A tool caddy can be kept on top of the stove for all your spoons and other gadgets. If you don’t have a spice rack, put all your spices in one box (even a covered or painted shoebox can work) so that you can grab them easily when cooking.

Be selective about what you display. It’s tempting to keep every notice from your child’s school, every memo from work, and so on, clipped to the front of your refrigerator so that you’ll remember everything, but chances are, you’ll get so overwhelmed with paperwork that nothing will stand out.