By By Suzann Sladcik Wilson, Beadphoria

Imagine living in a foreign country, going about your daily life as a teacher and jewelry supplier when suddenly, you don’t feel well.  You go to the Dr.’s hoping for the best, but hear the worst. You need heart surgery, specifically, artery repair. Your insurance refuses to cover it. The Dr.’s will only operate if you have $12,000 – upfront.

This is what is happening right now to Tanya of Aardvark Silver. She is an Australian who is currently living in Thailand. The past month since her diagnoses she has been riddled with pain in her chest and arm.  Stairs are particularly difficult. She states in her blog “I get the strangest looks from people as I stop and wait because I seem to look very healthy and am a young woman. I watch the old people bound up the stairs ahead of me…”

The great news is the beading community is rallying around her to help raise the funds she so desperately needs. MaryLou Holvenstot’s etsy shop time 2 cre8 is donating half the proceeds from her peyote stitch patterns to Tanya’s efforts. Facebook  page “Have a Heart for Tayna” is where you can see what other jewelry people are doing to help.

Time is running out, as the surgery is scheduled for Sunday, January 31, 2010. If you are able, please click here and donate. Please keep our friend Tanya in your thoughts and prayers! Thank you!

If you have any questions about beading, or helping hands, please feel free to contact me at 224-305-3321 or Suzann@Beadphoria.com. Always happy to share the joy of beading with you, Suzann Sladcik Wilson ofSuzann@Beadphoria.com. Always happy to share the joy of beading with you, Suzann Sladcik Wilson of Beadphoria.com.

Beadphoria Inspiration by Suzann S Wilson

By Suzann Sladcik Wilson, Beadphoria

Recently, Beadphoria received an order for 28 bracelets due in 2 weeks. The catch? They all need to be custom and different.

Beadphoria loves a challenge, but being creative on demand can be difficult. Where to turn when the muse has seemed to stop whispering in your ear? Here are a few sources Beadphoria goes to.

Inspiration Journals –having a place to keep your ideas in when they come to you is helpful during dry times. You can use inexpensive wire bound notebook or sketch book. Sketch out color combinations, partial patterns, or finished pieces. Dating your ideas is a fun way to see how you have progressed.

Catalogs-The mailbox is almost stuffed with catalogs these days. If something catches your eye, even if it is just a color palette, cut it out and slip it into your inspiration journal.

Bead Stew- I have a bowl on my workbench that after my bead board gets too cluttered, everything gets dumped into it. Eventually, the beads go where they belong, but before then, the beads seem to sometimes magically mix together. Many deigns have been sparked from my “bead stew”.

Web sites – May websites now have beading inspiration at just a few clicks away. Some favorites are Fusion Beads, e-patterns central, and of course the Beadphoria Website.

Where do you turn to for inspiration?

If you have any questions about beading, or Beading Inspiration, please feel free to contact me at 224-305-3321 or Suzann@Beadphoria.com. Always happy to share the joy of beading with you, Suzann Sladcik Wilson of Beadphoria.com.

Max and Zach become Star Bellied Sneetches.

by Sandra Beck, Motherhood Incorporated

Time is flying by in my 60 day self-care challenge and watching Shannon Penrod has inspired me to do less!  Now I know that sounds strange but those of you who don’t know us – need to know that though very similar in some respects – we are very different in other ways.  Shannon has taught me often enough, but I finally get it, to take time with my kids because they are only young for a short time.  She reminds me to spend time with them individually.

You see, I get really caught up in all that I have to do. Being responsible for two children, a mortgage, a car payment, a company to run, books to write, charity work to do,  health insurance, dogs, fish you name it wears on me and I run through my life living it all in 100 miles an hour.  My self care challenge is to slow down – prioritize and really think about how I want to spend my time.

I sit on the board of two charties and I am heavily involved in another. I am the Boy Scout leader for my son’s troop. I have my company to run and at the end of the day I feel stressed becuase I have no quiet time with my kids until 8 at night. My blackberry buzzes 24-7 and the warp speed of my life leaves me unfufilled and exhausted.

So this week I didn’t finish all the chapters that were due to my agent. I finished what was reasonable to me – two chapters.  I watched a movie with my mom, dad and brother.  And most fun of all, I slowed down long enough to read the Sneeches by Dr. Seuss and draw stars on my kid’s tummies.  We then went upstairs to my big bed and watched the animated version.  I went to bed with a pile of things undone, but a big smile on my face. I slept the best I had had in months.  I also, having learning this from Lisa Detres, Denise Bosey, Dawna Kennedy and Shannon Penrod, to give things up to God when I feel overwhelmed – and even when I don’t.  These powerful women have influenced me, guided me, protected me and inspired me.  So my self-care challenge for the week – and too keep it up is to slow down and prioritze as I go knowing that the world will not fall apart in my absence.

I hope you enjoy reading these blogs as much as we enjoy writing them! Should you have any questions about Motherhood Incorporated either as a client or as a mom looking for work, please email me directly at sandra@motherhoodincorporated.com  or you can check us out at www.motherhoodincorporated.com and www.sandrabeck.com.

by Shannon Penrod

About 30 days ago I went to one of my very best friends on the planet, Sandra Beck, and I said, “When did we stop treating ourselves as if we were anything other than a precious resource?”  We compared notes and agreed that if we treated our children the way we treat ourselves we would have cranky, miserable children AND we wouldn’t be able to look ourselves in the mirror!  So why was it okay for us to treat ourselves that way?  You know what I’m talking about, forgetting to eat lunch, staying up too late, not taking the time to play, POSTPONING going to the bathroom, inorder to finish the sentence, finish the dinner, finish the FILL IN THE BLANK.  We decided to challenge ourselves to 60 days of treating ourselves with the love, compassion and care that we glady bestow on our children.  I can’t speak for Sandra, but in my head I was picturing a 60 day spa vacation.  Hah!  Before we started we each made a list of the things we wanted to work on.   Both lists were a tall order.  Here we are nearly at the halfway mark and I am humbled by how different my life is.

Perhaps the biggest news is that I now have my own weekly radio show.  Everyday Autism Miracleswith Shannon Penrod will begin airing on Feb 12 at 11am (PST) live on Toginet Radio.  You can access it via the Internet at www.toginet.com and I hope you will! This is an amazing opportunity for me to shed some light on a much misunderstood neurological issue that is now affecting roughly one out of a hundred children worldwide.  Autism has been a part of my family’s reality for over four years now and to be able attack it publicly and positively is a dream come true.

I would love to report that this opportunity came about through hard work, perserverance and laser like focus.  It didn’t.  It was handed to me while I was busy doing other things, namely taking care of my needs and those of my family.  This is shocking to me and completely contrary to my old thought patterns.  I thought I had to scrape, toil, bleed and all but turn myself inside out to “create opportunity”.  Turns out maybe I just need to take care of myself, Wow!  Enlightening.

Physically and mentally, I am in a different place.  I am stronger and I feel stronger.  I feel more like me than I have in a long time.  I’m still exhausted, I think that is just a given of being a working mom, but I feel better equipped to deal with the exhaustion.  I no longer feel like the amazing 120 year old woman.  I don’t feel “old” anymore.  This is a relief. I’m not ready to feel old.  I still have sprinklers to run through, pillow fights to start and tickle sieges to mastermind.  After a bleak year of being diagnosed with Fibromyalgia and an auto immune disorder I am now once again hopeful about my future.

Spiritually, I believe I have come the furthest, and yet have the furthest yet to go.  Progress, not perfection.  There is a feeling of peace that has begun to grow inside me that is so wonderful that it defies description.  30 days ago I joked that I couldn’t imagine going on a retreat and meditating.  No phone?  No Internet!  No FACEBOOK?!?! Now I can not only imagine it, I want it and everyday I find time (even if it is only for 3 minutes) to create a quiet place in my home for meditation.  My husband wants to know who I am and what I have done with the body of his stressed out, dehydrated, sleep deprived wife.  He’s walking around the house looking for a pod!  I told him that I have sent that woman packing. She doesn’t live here anymore.  He didn’t seem all that disappointed.  It’s only day 25 – check back to see Me in 60 days!

By Sandra Beck, Motherhood Incorporated

Like most people I make lists for almost everything.  Grocery lists, a personal things to do list, a business things to do list, and even a list of things I would like to do if I can accomplish all of the things on my other lists.  I have post-it notes posted like multi-colored wallpaper in my office and around the house to remind me to check my lists.

I have a master planner to keep track of business meetings and conference calls in which I pencil in various other activities.  I have a mini planner in my brain but that one will occasionally malfunctions or shuts down from sensory overload.  This happens to most women at one time or another as a result of multi-tasking one too many tasks. Not only trying to balance my own tasks and lists but those of my children as well does get overwhelming at times.  This can cause a shift of some items from today’s list to tomorrow’s list.

Some days though it’s nice to close the planner, put the lists away, and just enjoy being a mom.  We all need a break now and again. Then, it’s back to  life as normal and all my lists.

I hope you enjoy reading these blogs as much I enjoy writing them!  Should you have questions about Motherhood Incorporated either as a client or as a mom looking for work, please email me directly at sandra@motherhoodincorporated.com or check us out at www.motherhoodincorporated.com and www.sandrabeck.com.

By Denise Bosey, Motherhood Incorporated

I have always been a working mother as have many of my friends.  I also have many friends who are stay at home mothers.  As the main breadwinner in our home I have to work so that we can live in our house, drive our cars, and send our daughter to a private college prep high school.  Fortunately, as a nurse I can work three 12 hour shifts a week allowing me time to spend with my children.  I am also fortunate enough to have a mother who is willing to care for my children when my husband and I are working.  I know many working mothers are not as lucky as me.  I enjoy my work and would never likely completely give up working even if I didn’t have to.  But I do envy my friends who are stay at home mothers.  Sometimes I feel that I miss out not being home every day. 

I recall many years ago a stay at home mother I knew coming up to me and asking if I was a stay at home mom.  When I said no, I listened to her berate me for not caring enough about our kids to stay home with them.  All I had to do was give up some of  our material things to do so.  I went on to explain to her that if I didn’t work we wouldn’t be able to live in our quiet little town and that I didn’t dump (her phrase not mine) my kids in any ole daycare facility but had a family member watch them.  I proceeded to inform her (with my anger steadily increasing) that I have a bachelors degree and work as an ICU nurse.  That apparently was enough to shut her up.  Thinking over this later I realized that I have nothing to be ashamed of and that if she or anyone else doesn’t like it that I work then they aren’t worth associating with. 

Recently a friend of mine who is also a working mother came across the same situation.  In her case she is a single parent so being a working mother is a necessity.   She felt the need to defend herself as well.  We both came to the conclusion that we are proud to be working mothers, holding down a job as well as holding down the fort and no one can take that away from us.

I hope you enjoy reading these blogs as much as we enjoy writing them! Should you have any questions about Motherhood Incorporated either as a client or as a mom looking for work, please email me directly at sandra@motherhoodincorporated.com  or you can check us out at www.motherhoodincorporated.com and www.sandrabeck.com.

By Sandra Beck, Motherhood Incorporated

Winter time is here and depending on where you live it is the beginning of a long stretch of cold weather.  Cold weather = high heating costs.  Just as our electric bills skyrocket during summer from running our air conditioner so our gas bills skyrocket from running our heater.  Whether you use natural gas or propane, heating costs mount up this time of year. 

But some simple tricks can ease the strain on your wallet and keep you from getting frostbite in your family room.  Check your windowsills and your door jams for drafts, if air is coming in somewhere then warm air is getting out.  You can stop these drafts using old t-shirts or towels or you can purchase weather stripping at your local hardware store.  This alone can save you a considerable amount on your heating bill.

Make sure your thermostat is in working order and set it at 65 degrees.  It can be a little cool but you can always snuggle up under the blankets or the comfy robe you got for Christmas.  By keeping it at a steady temperature the heater doesn’t have to work as hard to maintain it and therefore uses less fuel. Another helpful hint is to close vents in rooms that are not regularly occupied.  This way you are heating only the areas where you and your family congregate.  There are inexpensive small ceramic heaters you can buy that are safe for use in your home; make sure that this is a safe option for you—depending on your children’s ages and any pets you may have that can either knock over or get burned by one of these heaters.  Fireplaces and woodburning stoves can also go far in heating your home but make sure you have them professionally cleaned before use to prevent the chance of fire. 

So, enjoy your winter!

I hope you enjoy reading these blogs as much as I enjoy writing them!  Should you have any questions about Motherhood Incorporated either as a client or as a mom looking for work, please email me directly at sandra@motherhoodincorporated.com or check us out at www.motherhoodincorporated.com and www.sandrabeck.com.

by Shannon Penrod

Ughhh, I’ve got your squats, right here!  I’m halfway through my 30 day challenge on the Active program on Wii.  Hate is a really strong word, so I don’t want to use it, but I’m thinking it. It pains me to admit it but I  am seeing results, so I am plugging ahead, but  OYE!  Today the trainer introduced the “squat and hold”.  I’ve been doing the squats with no problems, but now she wants me to squat and hold it for 40 full seconds. My legs did the squat and I remember thinking, “I’ve got this.”  that lasted for 12 seconds at 13 seconds the muscles in my thighs started to shake and I was reminded of peeing in my twenties, when I would “hoover” instead of wrap and sit.  That doesn’t happen anymore.  At 28 seconds I broke out in a sweat and at 30 seconds I started talking out loud to God.  I didn’t make it to 40 seconds.  Amazingly, standing up didn’t end the pain, I had to walk it off, unfortunately my legs no longer worked.  I looked like Eugene Levy in the end of Splash when he tries to run after getting a shot of Novocaine in his leg!  Yeah, and then the trainer wanted me to do it again.  What, are you kidding me?  I did it, but I had to do it in about 8 tries and my son actually came in the room and wanted to know where the hurt dog was. (That’s what the noises I was making sounded like to him.)  And you know it’s gonna hurt tomorrow. Mutter, mutter, mutter.

Still, I am 17 days into the 60 day challenge and I have to say, I am amazed at how much can change in such a little time.  I feel different.  I know I am standing up straighter.  Clothes fit differently but that is minor compared to what is going on internally.  I feel more confident.  I am breathing deeper.  I am remembering to consider myself and my needs when I schedule things.  I am getting things done and looking forward to getting more done.  I am praying, meditating and seeing and feeling the results of that.  My husband and I are doing our “money mantra” nightly and it is amazing the difference.  One example, I was offered my own radio show last week!  And honestly that is just one of the many things that have happened!  I will have more info on the radio show soon!  Stay tuned.  I can’t wait to see me in 60 days!

Doing the best I can in my self care challenge.

by Sandra Beck, Motherhood Incorporated

I realize this morning that my self care challenge days don’t follow the calendar. This may be a dire prediction of my success or it could be yet again my need to march to a different drum or a different calendar altogether. You see I find it difficult to even remember the daily Self Care Challenge. I even went so far as to make labels that have all the items I can do to take care of myself and put them in my day planner. They are also on my Blackberry so I can read them.  AOL faithfully sends me a reminder email to my desktop and phone. I put post-its in my bathroom on the mirror.  How could I miss a day of self care?  But I did. And I missed three or four, but who’s counting?

The last few days escaped me. Here are my excuses. I had a sick toddler and a cranky soon-to-be six first grader. I had problems with my ex. I had problems with my nanny.  There were problems with my dogs. My mom, Stage 4 Breast Cancer, was not feeling well and lamenting her hair loss.  My dad came over because I had fallen off the face of the earth with my Blackberry battery dying and ironically put fresh batteries in the dead kitchen clock.  I was so busy, so frazzled, so pulled in a million directions that self care flew out the window. I just kept going – like that song, “put one foot in front of the other.”

I think that the best I can do this week is to remember that self-care is on the agenda and that even though I didn’t do any real self care I did blog and I did come clean with my inability to do everything. I am not superwoman. There is some relief in admitting that I , like most single working mothers, just get through their days one at a time.

I hope you enjoy reading these blogs as much as we enjoy writing them! Should you have any questions about Motherhood Incorporated either as a client or a mom looking for work, email us directly at sandra@motherhoodincorporated.com or check us out at www.motherhoodincorporated.com or www.sandrabeck.com

By Shannon Penrod

Day 11 and I have learned a valuable lesson.  Self care is about prioritizing yourself and your needs.  Of course I knew this, in fact I tell this to my coaching clients all the time.  I just had stopped practising it.  Is there anything worse than someone who isn’t walking their talk??  Consider me .  As usual I need to learn and re-learn things the hard way. 

On Wednesday I felt myself coming down with a cold.  I made some tea and kept moving.  I even did a light work out on Thursday morning.  By Thursday night I felt like poop on toast.  Well, that’s what happens when you get a cold…but you still need to soldier on, right?  My husband and my son were hoovering asking me how I was.  We had plans to go to Disneyland on Friday afternoon.  I told them we were still on.  Like I want to be the Mom who cancels Disneyland?  Why don’t I just blow up Santa’s Workshop while I’m at it?

Friday morning, not feeling so hot but I go to the gym and do 30 minutes of light biking with Sandra Beck.  We are doing a self care challenge together, I don’t want to let anybody down!  IRONY?  I go home from the gym and pack us up for Disneyland.  I crawled to the car and hoped for the best.  By the time we got to the big D (two hours in traffic) I wanted to crawl in a hole and die.  Everytime I looked at the map I judged the distance to the nearest First Aid Station.  I was beyond miserable.  When we got home a little after 11pm I was practically in tears, I was so grateful to be able to go to bed.

The good news?  I got it.  I really did.  Yes, my son would have been disappointed but he would have lived through it.  I would never take him to Disneyland if he wasn’t feeling well, even if he begged me, so what was I doing taking myself?  So I took a couple of days and really took care of myself.  I am a work in progress.  Today I did a light workout and felt better and more energized than I did before the workout.  A good sign.

Despite having had a cold I feel better.  My aches and pains have diminished.  Mentally, I feel clearer, dare I say more joyful? Spiritually, I’m feeling “plugged in”; amazing things are happening are happening career wise and hopefully I will be able to share that soon.  Has it only been 11 days?  Amazing!

By Denise K. Bosey RN BSN, Motherhood Incorporated

Let’s face it, as the mother of two daughters, ages 14 and 6, I am busy just keeping up with them.  Add to that my job as an ICU nurse and as a clinical professor of nursing for the local community college and you know that my life is often in a state of chaos.

One day recently I was rushing from picking up the girls from school to my youngest daughter’s karate class.  I reached into the basket of freshly laundered whites to gather together her outfit for karate. I grabbed two pieces, her top and her bottoms, or so I thought.

We rushed to karate, planning to have my daughter change into her karate clothes from her school clothes when we got to karate.  We arrived there and my youngest bounded from the car with her clothes in tow.  We went into the bathroom/dressing room at the karate studio and proceeded to change her clothes.  I put on her top and then reached for the bottoms.  As I prepared to put these on her, not really paying attention as I was going over the grocery list and my list of errands in my head, she says, “Mom, I can’t wear your lab coat as karate pants!”.  I looked down at the “pants” I was trying to put on her only to find out that I was asking her to put her legs into the sleeves of my lab coat that I wear when I am teaching at the hospital.  After a fit of hysterical laughter I put the pants she wore to school that day back on and went out and apologized profusely to her karate master for her not wearing the proper gear.

I then proceeded to my seat to watch, still red faced from a combination of embarrassment and my fit of laughter.  I was still giggling under my breath when a few of the other “karate moms” came in and sat down and asked what was so funny.   I told them my mistake and my daughter’s reaction and we all had a good laugh.  It taught me a lesson too, to slow down and take time to think about what you are doing before you do it, in the end it will save you time.

I hope you enjoy reading these blogs as much as we enjoy writing them! Should you have any questions about Motherhood Incorporated either as a client or a mom looking for work, email us directly at sandra@motherhoodincorporated.com or check us out at www.motherhoodincorporated.com or www.sandrabeck.com

Flarp - available on line and at local drug stores and superstores.

by Sandra Beck, Motherhood Incorporated

Today part of my 60 Day Self Care Challenge is to honor the statement made by my good friend Dawna, “The World will no fall apart in My Absence.”  So despite the fact that there are bills to pay, invoices to send, groceries to buy and laundry to do – not to mention clean Buttercup’s eye again…I decided to take off for this Saturday morning and play with the kids.

A surprisingly fun gift that came for us for the holidays from a dear friend was Flarp.  This gooey, fruit scented tub of goo – has entertained my kids for over 4 hours over 2 days.  It’s gross and slimy – though it doesn’t leave a stain on walls, windows or carpets -but in hair if it dries is hard to get out.  What’s the best part of this $2 tub of goo is the imagination it inspires.  We have made Flarp ropes, Flaperangs, Flarp Hats. We have had a Flarp fight. We have thown it on the ceiling to watch it peel off and fall down. We have wet it, froze it and warmed it between our hands. It’s been sat on and rolled by the dogs who sniffed but did not eat.

We laughed and giggled and compared colors. I got pink. Zach green and Max blue.  There was no TV and nothing but a mom and two kids having a ball in the moment. What’s so funny as that the original intention of the product was to make stinky noises…and that was the least interest my kids had in the toy.  It comes in its own little jar and hasn’t dried out as far as I can tell but for a rainy day or a snowy day – or just to have a little fun I would highly recommend it.  And its a whole lot less expensive than the Wii.

I hope you enjoy reading these blogs as much as I enjoy writing them.  If you have any questions about Motherhood Incorporated either as a client or as a mom looking for work, email me directly at sandra@motherhoodincorporated.com  or check us out at www.motherhoodincorporated.com and www.sandrabeck.com.

by Sandra Beck, Motherhood Incorporated

My son Zach in the fields near my parent's home enjoying and learning the value of nature.

I didn’t blog yesterday and I did go to the gym – yesterday I learned a lot about myself and lot about what I can do.  And what I do teaches and inspires others.

I was getting the mail when out of my canyon limps a little fluffy white dog with a bloody eye and matted face.  It all but wobbled into my arms and I took it home.  No chip. No collar. No ID.  I planned to treat its wounds, bath and trim out the mats and sticks. I had the overwhelming feeling of – oh no – another mouth to feed. Another responsibility.

Then I was thankful that I could help. At least temporarily. Even though it wasn’t self care and ultimately it would require more effort of me to find her a home or return her to the owner – doing something good for something that expected nothing feels pretty good…

When I got her home, the kids came running over to help me with the little injured dog. As we took care of her, my older son talked about the story he had heard about the Good Samaritan.  That’s what we were.  That’s also how I ended up with 5 little dogs on my ranch.  We named her Buttercup because she looks like a little lamb…and we are going to try to find her a home.

She is now deaf and blind on the side of her head injured by a dog, coyote or mountain lion.  Zach likes to cover her up with his blankie and say – there you go good doggie…now you are safe.  I was able to teach my kids about the value of living things, compassion, and the part of nature that makes brought Buttercup into our home.

She doesn’t leave Zach’s side and that’s pretty gutsy for a dog to hang with a rambunctious three year old. Right now he’s t rying to get her to pay attention as he “reads” to her… I look at my little son and this broken dog  in the corner of my living room all content, happy, fed and safe and I feel good. Sure it’s more work for us…another mouth to feed, but at the end of the day it feels good to watch the compassion and care come from both of my active boys.

I hope you enjoy reading these blogs as much as I enjoy writing them.  If you have any questions about Motherhood Incorporated either as a client or as a mom looking for work, email me directly at sandra@motherhoodincorporated.com  or check us out at www.motherhoodincorporated.com and www.sandrabeck.com.

By Shannon Penrod

I am 7 Days into a 60 self care challenge and I can clearly see now how far off the rails this self care thing had gotten.  Whoa Nellie! I am shocked at how much harder this has been than I thought it would be!  I feel like I’m learning how to drive all over again.  I remember thinking I would never be able to drive and listen to the radio at the same time - there were so many things to keep track of.  And look at me now, I can drive while talking to a client on my blue tooth, answer my son’s questions and still navigate the world’s busiest highways.  So there is hope that I can manage to  feed my mental and spiritual health while keeping my legs clean shaven, my roots free of grey and my gluteus maximus moving to a cardio beat.  I’m not there yet, but it is only day 7!

So far my big revelations are two fold:

  1) This is a much bigger mental challenge than it is a physical challenge.

2) I waste a lot of time on things that are neither important to me, nor beneficial to me.

Mentally, I have gotten used to putting my needs last or deleting them from the list altogether.  Nobody asked me to do this, I think it comes in package deal with pregnancy hormones.  The new baby comes and there are some new priorities, breastfeeding, changing diapers, preventing a busy toddler from licking their fingers and sticking them in an electrical outlet.  Those kinds of things can cut into a girl’s schedule.  They certainly cut in to mine.  And admittedly my motherhood path was eventually consumed with Autism and the need to do everything I could to get my child back.  Mentally I just need to get my head around the fact that my life is different now.  I’m still a mom, and I’m still working to do everything I can for my child but there really is time for me to have needs.

Finding the time has been a revelation.  I always say that I have no time.  There’s no time.  Oh, if only there were more time.  I have a friend that always reminds me that I have the exact number of hours everyday that Mother Theresa had.  No pressure! 

I’ve started to look at how I spend my time and to quantify it – is this important?  Is it beneficial to me?  It has really been an eye opener.  Watching Glee, not really important in the scheme of world peace, but it is beneficial to me, I am a happier person after watching Glee.  Taking ten minutes to watch a report on Kate Gosselin’s new make over, neither important nor beneficial!  Reading to my son every night, important and beneficial.  I don’t want to be on my death bed wishing for all of the minutes I spent on stupid and inane things so I am attempting to at least be conscious of how I choose to spend my time.

In other news, my husband and I have been doing the money mantra for two days and already it is working, more on this later.  It’s going to be an interesting 60 days!

Amazing Egg Dish - Egg Parm

SEARCH FOR INCREDIBLE PEOPLE

One Incredible Person Will Get a Chance to Appear in the Incredible Edible Egg™ Ad Campaign

Are you incredible? Do you have a unique talent that exhibits extraordinary body and mind skills? Have you done something incredible for your community? America’s egg farmers want to know if you have what it takes to be the next Incredible Person! Past Incredible People include stunt woman Luci Romberg and world champion sport stacker Luke Myers. And, like Luci and Luke, the next incredible person will have a chance to appear in an incredible edible egg™ advertisement showing how eggs provide the mind and body energy to be incredible any day of the week.

America’s egg farmers want to hear your story. Visit www.IncredibleEgg.org to upload a video of you or your child’s extraordinary physical and mental energy skills. The winner will:

• Have a chance to appear in an incredible edible egg advertisement
• Receive a year’s supply of eggs
• Select a local food bank to receive 10,000 eggs from America’s egg farmers

Five random entries will win hand-held video cameras. Finally, for every video uploaded, America’s egg farmers will match every uploaded video with one egg to Feeding America, the nation’s largest hunger relief organization. All incredible stories must be submitted by Friday, February 19, 2010.

Eat Incredible!
If you want your family to be incredible, they need to eat incredible − starting at breakfast. “Research shows that there are important cognitive benefits of eating breakfast, especially for children,” said Bridget Swinney, Registered Dietitian, Baby Bites author and mother of two. “For 70 calories and 14 cents apiece, eggs are a great choice for breakfast because the high-quality protein in eggs provides steady and sustained energy, helping kids and adults be incredible all day long.”

Swinney recommends feeding your family a high-quality protein breakfast, like eggs, since they’re affordable, easy-to-prepare and a great way to start the day off right. Try these recipes:

• Spinach, Ham and Cheese Omelet ($1.20/serving)
• Coffee Cup Scramble ($0.45/serving)

For more egg recipes to increase mind and body energy, and additional information on the search for incredible people, visit www.IncredibleEgg.org.

By Sandra Beck, Motherhood Incorporated

I have had many mothers ask me if they should send their children to preschool and if so, when?   Preschool is a big step in any child’s life. It provides not only a basis for elementary education, more importantly, it provides socialization skills that a child can use throughout life.  By learning to interact with others in a protected environment, they learn how to share, how to be more accepting of others, and how to be a part of a group.   They start to learn self-control.  They also get a chance to make new friends, how great is that! 

So, when is a good time to think about sending your child to preschool?  It will vary from child to child.  There may also be age or behavior constraints at your local preschool such as your child must be of a certain age (some preschools won’t take a child under 3) or they have to be potty trained.  Other preschools will take children who aren’t potty trained. Check with your local preschool.  Your child will often give you clues that they are ready for preschool.  If they have an older sibling they will tell you outright they want to go to school too when they are ready.  They may show you that they can write (this is usually a set of scribbles somewhat resembling letters) and tell you they want to learn how to read their bedtime stories.

Preschool builds a great foundation for future education.  It starts building your child’s desire to learn more about the world around them.  So, if you are considering sending your toddler to preschool, do your research and then do it.

I hope you enjoy reading these blogs as much as I enjoy writing them.  If you have any questions about Motherhood Incorporated either as a client or as a mom looking for work, email me directly at sandra@motherhoodincorporated.com  or check us out at www.motherhoodincorporated.com and www.sandrabeck.com.

by Sandra Beck, Motherhood Incorporated

Changing into a Lovely Butterfly

So I did go to spin class, however it wasn’t the best of workouts. I got there late and the only bike left was the cruddy one with the funky foot pedal. I stayed for about 20 minutes because the workout became too frustrating. I was in a real mood because I had eaten only my soup and done my shake – and boy was I crabby. So much for self-care.  Then I did something that I normally wouldn’t do.

I dug through my gym bag and loaded my hair up with conditioner and sunk myself into the gym’s hot tub.  There was so much chlorine in the tub I don’t think I will have to shave my legs for a month, but there I was bubbling away with a big grin on my face. Self care wasn’t so bad…sure I wasn’t exercising but I did think about the day and felt my cares melt away. The kids were with their father so there was no reason for me to rush home.  So I bubbled. I bubbled and bubbled some more. I thought about my Blackberry and how it needed to discharge completely once in a while to keep the battery happy.  I was discharging and it kept me happy!

Instead of thinking about all I had to do…all I hadn’t gotten done and worrying about what I’d forgotten I did what I advise my clients to do -to let yourself go because if at the end of the day you did your best then rest easy because you could do no more. I did my best and that’s all I could do so I took my own advice and let go. 

Once home I went to bed at 9:00. I slept until 7a the next morning and woke up refreshed and wonderful. I was ready to greet my day with a smile and a spring in my step.  I realized that sometimes self-care is doing less not more. I listed to my body and let it guide me – and it wasn’t to the fridge and it wasn’t to the computer. As a result, today I feel better and stronger despite doing less…I invite you to think about how you can do LESS today not more. Not everyday, but once in a while it feels good to just simply recharge.

I hope you enjoy reading these blogs as much as I enjoy writing them! Should you have any questions about Motherhood Incorporated either as a client or as a mom looking for work, please email me directly at sandra@motherhoodincorporated.com or you can check us out at www.motherhoodincorporated.com and www.sandrabeck.com.

By Shannon Penrod

I’m so over myself today.  Do you ever get sick of yourself?  I am so sick of myself today; I would just like to take a vacation… from me.  Never mind that things are going well, all I want to do is whine.  I’m tired, I’m sore, Wah, wah, wah.  My higher self just wants to say, “Shut up!  It’s not like you’re being asked to haul water through the desert!  Or go through Chemo – you’ve just taken care of yourself for 4 and a half days!  No one is on fire!  Get over yourself!”  Which shuts me up for a minute and then I go right back to whining.  I’m pretty sure that part of self care is having more patience with myself, even when I am whiny, but I’m a work in progress.

There are some elements of self care that seem to be getting easier, or at least more automatic.  The exercise thing…it is now easier to do it than not do it.  I’m still not loving the Wii Active Program, there is a lot of running and jumping which these old bones don’t appreciate, but it appears to be working so I’m just doing it.  I’m still whining but the body is moving.

Actually the spiritual thing is pretty much the same – I’m less reluctant to pray and meditate, but I’m still eager to find other things to do in its place.  I actually cleaned my oven today to put off my meditation time – what’s that about?

I’ve noticed that I don’t excel at doing things when they work.  A couple of years ago my husband and I decided to do a money mantra every night before bed.  It involved taking two minutes to stretch together while reciting a phrase designed to eliminate negative thinking about our finances.  Within a week my husband was invited on a game show where he won several thousand dollars and he booked a film, out of nowhere we suddenly had significantly more money.  On top of that both of us felt physically better because of the stretching.  So did we keep doing the money mantra?  Noooooo!  We promptly stopped, that very week, I think.  Alright, enough whining, I’m going to go find my husband and do a money mantra.  Who knows what will happen this time.  From now on when I feel the urge to whine I’m going to do my money mantra.

Please join me on this 60 journey and let me know what you are working on.  There is strength in numbers.  For more info on me and my journey through autism with my son visit my website www.shannonpenrod.com or you can contact me directly at shannonpenrod2@aol.com.

Sandra Beck & Max Levin

by Sandra Beck, Motherhood Incorporated

Day 2. Wow! The next 58 days are really yawning ahead of me…gaping open wounds just filled with no cookies, workouts that leave me gasping and a teeny tiny wallet that barely covers a good mani and pedi. I do get motivated when I read Shannon Penrod’s blogs – they make me keep going when I don’t feel like it – and its only the second day.

It’s not that I am lazy – far from it.  I am actually hard working, industrious, creative and somewhat high strung and driven – and I have been an athlete most of my life. So why the drag? Why the avoidance? Why do I do everything else I can possible think of before I hit the gym. The funny thing is – after I work out I feel great. I feel strong, fit and happy. Most of my stress and cares disappear and I practically dance my way out of the place after I work out. It’s just getting there that is my trouble.

Why do I avoid something that makes me feel so good, when I crave that which makes me feel so bad (sugar, salt and fat.) There must be some psychological anchor in me that equates working out as a negative and eating chocolate chip cookies and bread as a positive. Maybe its the immediate gratification thing. I can feel sick and bloated later, but enjoy the sugar, salt and fat now!  It does take a while to get started at the gym and get the good feeling flowing…so maybe that’s it.

Either way, I did go to my Krav Maga class held at Acton Karatetoday – and struggled through with the rest of the group who also missed class a lot over the holidays. I wasn’t the only one who played hooky. Now, four hours later I am tired, feeling good and already thinking about ditching my spin class at 6:30 tonight.  You will have to check in with me tomorrow to see if I went – ooh the delayed gratification!  I think for today I am going to consider my kids and how much more fun we have when mom is fit and happy.  I am going to officially invite all 140 Moms at Motherhood Incorporated to join me in the Self Care Challenge!

I hope you enjoy reading these blogs as much as I enjoy writing them! Should you have any questions about Motherhood Incorporated either as a client or as a mom looking for work, please email me directly at sandra@motherhoodincorporated.com or you can check us out at www.motherhoodincorporated.com and www.sandrabeck.com.

By Shannon Penrod

Someone told me recently that anger is just fear masquerading as something manageable.  I smiled at her like I understood what she meant and continued to angrily rant at the driver who had just cut me off.  I think I might be beginning to get it.  I was so angry yesterday… about everything. Angry that my body doesn’t want to do what I am asking it to do, angry that time goes so quickly and no matter how fit I get I’m never going to be 25 again, angry that I can’t be in five places at once, angry that my son has Autism, angry, angry, angry. 

 So I meditated.  In my meditations I have been asking God to take my fears.  It wasn’t until I meditated yesterday, filled with anger, that I felt the connection between the anger and the fear. It was life a knife slicing open a bag full of gunk, the anger went away and all this fear came pouring out.  Fear that was just as irrational as the anger, but it was fear none the less.  Then with the fear came this little voice, “Eat something and you’ll feel better.”  It was a familiar voice. 
One I have listened to far too often.  As I continued to meditate and more fear came up, the voice got louder and more insistent. 

The truth is that I don’t like to be uncomfortable, in any way shape or form.  Somewhere in my youth I learned that when you are uncomfortable there are ways to numb the discomfort, like eating.  Of course there are thousands of ways of numbing but I chose eating as my preferred method.  It was fast, easy and socially acceptable in my family.  Eventually I became, as I am fond of calling it, “circus fat”.  Circus fat is when you aren’t just fat, you aren’t just obese, you are remarkably fat.  When you are circus fat your  first thought upon sitting on any chair is, “Am I going to break this?”  When you are circus fat you don’t shop in most stores only specialty stores meant for people who are circus fat. When you are circus fat one size fits all is a joke, and one size fits most is a cruel joke.  I was circus fat through most of my 30’s.  Then I lost 100 lbs.  That was a revelation.  My life changed, I got married, I got pregnant. I gained  75 lbs. back.  Ouch. I lost the first 25 of the 75 easily and have kept it off.  In the six and half years since my son was born I have yo-yoed back and forth gaining and losing the same 25 lbs.  But I get to the point where I am right now and I get uncomfortable. 

I’m at a crossroads and I know it.  I put on my elastic waist work out pants today and felt the anger, fear and discomfort.  They almost don’t fit.  They are almost unwearable, because they are too big!  It frightened me.  I know it is irrational to most people, but I’m being bone honest.  It is scary to me to get smaller.  What will I wear, what will I look like, who will I be if I’m not the fat funny girl?  People expect more of you when you are smaller.  This is what my head says.  I know better, I got there once and it felt great.  But losing weight means being willing to be uncomfortable some times.  For me losing weight is like surrendering body armor.  It leaves me feeling vulnerable.

I promised myself on day one I would deal with the fear and not the B.S. that surrounds the fear.  I just didn’t realize how fast it would come up.  I’m breathing, meditating and moving. Most importantly I am asking God to take the fear and I am staying the course.  And Sandra is here with me!  Yeah, Sandra!  Who else is coming with us to the next level?  Write in and let us know you are with us.

By Sandra Beck, Motherhood Incorporated

One of the most important lessons you can teach your child is the importance of a strong work ethic. This is something that will serve your child well throughout their lifetime.  Children learn by example so show them the strength of your own work ethic.  This is a life lesson that has gone by the wayside.

Our parents were raised to work hard to provide for their families in the hope that our lives would be just that much better than their own.  Hard work was tantamount to success.  There are some of us who have heeded this all important life lesson and others who consider it a foreign concept.

One of my friends has a teenage daughter who has already taken this lesson to heart.  At least once a week after school she is an assistant in a class at the local grade school. Her mother instilled in her the importance of going to school and working hard to get what she wants out of life in the hope that she will go on to be a successful adult.  Some of her friend’s parents aren’t as diligent, they let their children stay home for something as innocuous as an ingrown toenail, thereby teaching them that their education is not that important and that if you don’t feel like doing something you don’t have to. These are the same children who will go on to become adults who can’t hold a steady job because they don’t want to put in the effort.  These are the same children who will be responsible for caring for us someday! I don’t know about you but that’s a frightening prospect to me.

So, start young and instill the value of a strong work ethic in your children and guarantee their future success.

I hope you enjoy reading these blogs as much as I enjoy writing them! Should you have any questions about Motherhood Incorporated either as a client or as a mom looking for work, please email me directly at sandra@motherhoodincorporated.com or you can check us out at www.motherhoodincorporated.com and www.sandrabeck.com.

by Sandra Beck, Motherhood Incorporated

I sat down to write out my thoughts for the next 60 days only to be interrupted with my son tattling on the other son. “Zach just peed in your Baja Fresh Cup,” Max said.  With my new 2010 Zen I simply asked him to pour it into the sink and run the water along with a request to never do that again, please.

I came up with my 10 step program that hits the mental, physical, spiritual, financial and emotional aspects of self-care as it relates to me. Judge, laugh, giggle and snort at my self-care program, but at the end of the day find a way to make it apply to you and take better care of yourself. I am sure there is another mother out there who does fine in self-care; I have just never met one.   So here goes, and let’s see how I do over the next 60 days.

1. Frugal and Fabulous – I am going to find a way each day to look fabulous on a frugal budget. As a sole, self-supporting mother of two young boys, I can’t continually look like hell just to save money.
2. It’s Hip to Be Square- I am a geek. Plain and simple. I am going to move into the world feeling great about my nerdiness.
3. Move My Feet –I am going to get back on my daily exercise because it keeps me emotionally stable, hopeful and feeling great.
4. Embrace Change – I have spent the better part of two years trying to keep my life the same despite the death of my 16 year marriage. I am going to not only accept the resulting changes but embrace them.
5. The World will not Fall Apart in my Absence – my very wise friend told me this last year and she was right. I am going to get away more and learn to let go and not try to live my entire life in the next 60 seconds.
6. Grow, lead and Succeed – I am not going to go all Semper Fi, but I will working on my leadership skills, my personal and professional growth and keep marching on with my success plan for my company so I can afford the life I want.
7. Heart full of Joy Attitude – yep, I am going to work out of the doom and gloom that creeps up on my with my fears of raising these two little boys alone and be grateful for all that I have and am.
8. Helpful, Humorous and Odd- I saw this at Barnes and Noble on a sign and wanted to have it. That’s me. Helpful, humorous and odd. I am going to embrace that is who I am.
9. Everyday Matters – I am going to drop the I will work out tomorrow, this burger and fries don’t matter I will eat better tomorrow. No more tomorrow- everyday matters in my physical and nutritional well being.
10. Finish Before Starting Anything New – this is going to be my hardest challenge. I have so many things going on at once which alternately stresses me out and thrills me with the competition. An exhilarating but draining process that needs to stop.

 I would love to read any of your self care challenges as I embark on this ambitious and exciting challenge of trying to take good care of myself as a single working mother of two young boys!

by Sandra Beck

Sandra Beck last self care in memory 1996.

I agreed to do a 60 day self-care program with Shannon Penrod and to write about it as we go.  I have already failed. Blew the first two days – ugh…okay must go on. I realized when doing this and looking at pictures that the last time I really took good care of myself was in 1996. 14 years ago.

So its day 3 already, according to the calendar but DAY 1 for me. You see, this weekend was a huge mess – total bust if you will.  I had great dreams of menu planning, workout scheduling and a visit to the local sport’s store for an entirely new workout wardrobe. Instead, I washed four dogs, fed and fever busted two sick kids, put away holiday decorations while worrying about the flame enticing Christmas tree dropping its needles in my living room.  Our menu planning consisted of raiding my mom’s fridge down the street and entirely new wardrobe? Ha! I am still in yesterday’s jammies. I wanted to be funny in this blog. I am too tired and stressed to be funny.

Excuses. The single mom thing is viable but getting old. Working Mother? Others do it.  Company owner? They do it to.  Self Care? Why is it so difficult.  Writing the blog about self care didn’t get done much less actual self care in action. I even thought about back posting the first two blogs, but ultimately didn’t since recently in a newspaper I was called an “Inspiration.”  I would then be an Inspiration to cheating. 

Right now it’s 8pm on Sunday night. My children are flinging themselves on my bed doing cannon balls hollering “take me to the sea” while the Sneeches blares in my ear. School starts up again tomorrow so that my help the self care. What’s really annoying is that before Thanksgiving I was rocking on my self care program.

I would canyon walk with my friend Christy, hit my Krav Maga classes at Acton Karate and even watched what I was eating. Then I fell off the wagon. Completely.  Bodies in motion, stay in motion. Mine didn’t.  Bodies that crash on the couch stay put. Bodies that eat junk food keep eating junk food.  The whole debacle resulted in a 1o pound gain.  I had planned to lose a whopping 30 pounds this year.  Now I have 40.  I feel completely and utterly overwhelmed.

How’s that for inspiration?

Day 1 I decided begins tomorrow since today is over in 4 hours.  I am going to use the few minutes I have once I get my spawn to sleep to put together an action plan.  The words of Tony Robbins blare in my head, “Fail to plan…plan to fail.”  He’s right and I know it. I gotta plan before I can do anything these days…if it’s not on my list, on my to-do or programmed into my phone it won’t happen.

My son just walked over and asked what I was doing. I told him. 

His response: “Mom, Just don’t lose ALL your fat – then you won’t be good to lie on.”  That’s what I have been reduced to: a human pillow.

Sandra Beck would love to hear from you and have you join her in her 60 day challenge. Please contact her directly at sandrabeck2@aol.com if you are interested – and check back regularly for updates on her 60 day challenge!

By Shannon Penrod

Now I remember why I don’t exercise.  It’s boring and painful.  My inner thighs are aquiver and it’s not with lust. I go to walk down stairs and there is a searing pain through my thighs that mocks me and reminds me that exercise is for the young and fit.  I feel like a ninety year old woman who has lost her walker.  I know, it’s just lactic acid that has built up in my muscles and once I exercise today it will feel better. I know this, but can I make myself do it? I have to, it’s only day three for heaven’s sake!

Besides, I’m actually starting to notice a difference.  It might all be in my head, but my head is where the real shift needs to happen anyway. I feel lighter.  I feel smaller.  I might be standing up straighter. It hurts, but I’m doing it.

I went shopping yesterday and tried on clothes.  You know how when you are in the middle of a renovation project there comes a point of no return; the demolition mess is so horrible you have no choice but to move forward.  My body is a demolition mess.  I’ve lost just enough weight for there to be hope but the weight loss wasn’t uniform and the skin and muscle haven’t caught up. I used to look like the Michelin Man, now I look like a statue that someone threw pudding at.  It’s not pretty.  Now is not a good time to stop.

I did the Wii Active yesterday, day 3 of the 30 challenge – Where is Bob Greene? I thought I was doing this with him and instead I am stuck with this vapid, smiling woman who has inner thighs you could probably bounce a quarter off of. I’ll bet she was a cheerleader.  Oh my, where has my inner Buddha gotten to today?  I confess, I’m cranky.  I wish I had gotten the Jenny McCarthy exercise program for Christmas.  My bad, I wasn’t specific.  I told my husband I wanted a Wii training program and for him to pick.  He’s in the video game business, albeit as a voice over actor, apparently voicing Sub-Zero doesn’t give him insider info on what program I will actually enjoy.  Let’s be honest, if I had the Jenny program, I’d probably be ragging on her today, too.  I’m in pain.  Lactic acid, I know.  But for now I’m pining for Jenny, she’s an Autism mom, she gets it!  Her program doesn’t have a silly strap that keeps slipping off my thigh!   For now, Jenny is not in the budget.  Maybe in 30 days.  If nothing else, if the strap thing doesn’t improve in 30 days I am going to exchange it for YOUR SHAPE.  For now I am sticking to my commitment.

I am continuing to meditate, but clearly not enough.

By Shannon Penrod

So far I have learned that self care is exhausting.  It is eye opening to me how much time I spend taking care of others and how willing I am to postpone taking care of myself.  That can’t be good.  I have to wonder when that started; I distinctly remember being pregnant and taking brilliant care of myself.  I rested, I ate right, I moisturized, I meditated, I took long walks, contemplated the universe and filled my head and heart with spiritual thoughts.  Okay, I also stressed….a lot, about everything; but the point is I took care of myself.  When did that stop?  I could spend the day contemplating that question but the truth is I won’t be any closer to creating the habit of self care.  That is exactly what I am trying to do create a habit.  The Grand Canyon wasn’t formed in a day, but one little trickle of water coursing over those rocks day after day eventually made dent.  I am one with the trickle of water.

Yesterday I began my 30 day challenge with Bob Greene on the Wii Active.  I whined, I kvetched, I self deprecated and criticized but I did it.  It comes with this handy little strap that you attach to your upper thigh, it holds one of the controllers so the system can recognize your movements and tell you if you are doing it properly, that’s the idea anyway.  The very athletic trainer on the screen showed me how to attach the strap; she wrapped it around her firm thigh with no problems.  When I slapped it on my thigh I encountered gush.  Gush is what you get when you don’t exercise for almost a decade.  The thing about gush is does what it wants to and when it encounters a tight Velcro strap; it rebels and migrates south making the strap no longer fit.  There I am trying to do the exercise, hold the strap to the errant gush and trying to breathe.  I looked like an asthmatic wild woman having a seizure, but according to the program I burned 130 calories.  It’s a start.  Later I went on a nature hike with my son; something that happens so infrequently that he asked me if the car was broken.  I am one with the trickle of water.

On the spiritual front… I did meditate, and I read something spiritually minded.  I asked God to take away all my fears and that I be an instrument of good.  I took the time to appreciate what I have instead of dwelling on what I don’t have.  I expressed gratitude.

On the mental health horizon I did not compulsively tear down all of the Christmas decorations, my usual M.O. for New Year’s Day.  I did do some, but I didn’t make it a one day hurdle.  I took the time to be with my son at the park with no cell phone or lap top – WOW! I sat down and watched a movie with my husband; and I moisturized.  For me this is mental health.

On the financial/career path, I visualized my dream job and when thoughts and images of it conflicting with my son’s care came to squash the picture I shooed them away and pictured him happy and healthy and with me.  I faced my bank balance and cringed but at least there was a balance.  Thank God.  I spent nothing and I cleaned out my purse and wallet.  There is nothing old and useless in my new purse.  My money is organized and all the presidents are facing the same way.  Suze Orman would be happy.

The bad news….I got in bed at 1:15…this is not self care.  I am one with the trickle of water.  Today is a new day, a new opportunity to do better and create new habits.  I am one with the trickle of water.